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A Bitter Bandwagoner Habs Fan’s TSM: Hatqvist

Just because the Canadiens are out doesn’t mean I’m gonna miss out on the chance to watch the best hockey of the season, and to talk about it. But I’m a Habs fan, so I’m bitter.

This isn’t really a traditional TSM in that I’ll probably make comments about games other than the ones I’m currently watching, but they will generally focus on one of the teams I’m cheering for.

Who, you ask, are those teams? Well, I have no self-control, so I have a lot of them. My team in the west, and my regular second team is the Ducks, but Sidney Crosby might just be my favourite player in the league, and who doesn’t want to see Ovi win the Cup? So I’ll be watching all of them. Who are you watching?

First Period

  • I love watching Crosby. I really should have watched more Penguins games this year. He’s just so good.
  • Must be nice to be the Penguins and have a new coach…I wish we could have a new coach…
  • On the other hand, their goalie tandem is like starting Scrivens and Fucale right now. In the playoffs. Maybe even Pasquale and Fucale. gulp
  • Words cannot express how badly I want the Rangers to lose. Also the Lightning. I told you I’m bitter.
  • Sundqvist, Hornqvist and Lundqvist all in a game together.
  • The Penguins are gonna give me a heartattack. It’s also gonna take a while to get used to a style of hockey that’s not the Habs’.
  • Uh…I’m not even entirely sure where that penalty was?
  • Not going to lie, while I’d obviously prefer the Habs to be in the playoffs and deal with the tension and anxiety, the fact that I can watch playoff hockey without the constant anxiety all spring long is kind of nice. Of course there’s nothing like the thrill of watching your team in the playoffs either though…
  • The Rangers are spending a lot of time in the offensive zone. It’s making me very uncomfortable.
  • Uh I am not entirely sure why that penalty either. They are really calling everything. This is strange. I’m used to nothing getting called. Isn’t it the playoffs??? Oh Tim Peel. Suddenly not surprised.
  • The Penguins have an aggressive and beautiful penalty kill. Boy do I ever like those. I knew I picked them for a reason.
  • Oh dear. Lundqvist is down…Oh geez it’s his own player. Oh god the stick right into his eye.
  • The King stays in, and the Penguins score.

Second Period

  • Oh man Tampa/Detroit gets Bob Cole. I’m jealous.
  • Aaaaand Raanta is in for Lundqvist.
  • What even is Kreider doing? I don’t know why I’m asking that. It’s Kreider.
  • Aaaaaaaaand now Glass got a puck in the face.
  • Everything is happening. Bob Cole is calling the wrong game.
  • …The Rangers are dropping like flies. Guys, it’s only the first game of the first series!! You can’t all get hurt NOW.
  • Side note: Dear St. Louis, I’ll thank you forever if you ensure that I don’t have to hear Chelsea Dagger after the first round. Love, Me.
  • Rangers take yet another penalty. One day the Penguins will get their act together on the powerplay… That sounds familiar…I guess that’s what Anaheim and Washington are for.
  • Wow. What a play by Rick Nash though.
  • They made the Rangers players spend almost the entire penalty kill in their own zone running around. Of course…they didn’t score, AND almost gave up a shorthanded goal. That doesn’t sound at all familiar. Nope. Not even slightly.
  • Eeeeewww the Lightning are winning. Someone stop them.
  • ZATKOFF.
  • OH man. You do not let Sidney Crosby get in all alone like that and come away unscathed. Don’t mind me. I’ll just be sitting here clutching my face until the start of the third. That was magnificent.
  • I really love Sidney Crosby. Have I mentioned?

Third Period

  • Meanwhile in Tampa, Tampa wins. Booo.
  • *PING*
  • Someone please remove Kreider.
  • Uh oh. Rangers powerplay.
  • I have a bad feeling about this…wait…where did the Haeglin penalty come from?? Oh geez.
  • This is gonna end well. I’m gonna go hide under my bed in the other room and come out when it’s over.
  • Ew.
  • Damn you Stepan. That was some really nifty passing though.
  • Lovejoy saves a goal going towards gaping net, AND KUHNHACKL SCORES ON THE TWO-ON-ONE GOING THE OTHER WAY.
  • How I adore penalty kills that lead to goals for.
  • HORNQVIST.
  • Kessel didn’t touch him. 4-1 Penguins
  • Can we have a Hatqvist? (I’ll show myself out.)
  • Ew. Not again. Oh man that was a filthy goal.
  • Ok Penguins. Please score some more goals. There is too much time left.
  • Dan Girardi makes a lot of money for a not so good anymore hockey player.
  • I think the refs remembered that it’s the playoffs.
  • HATQVIST.
  • Zatkoff was great, Crosby existed, Hornqvist got a hatty. The Rangers lost.
  • There is nothing like playoff hockey.


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