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Canadiens @ Flyers Top Six Minutes: Kovalchuk scores, Kotkaniemi can crack

Ilya Kovalchuk did what he’s known for, while Jesperi Kotkaniemi did something he absolutely isn’t known for.

NHL: Montreal Canadiens at Philadelphia Flyers Eric Hartline-USA TODAY Sports

For our new readers and members, the Top Six Minutes is a continuation of the discussion in the game thread. We try to keep it light and entertaining. Full recaps are up the morning after every game.

I have no words. Tank or be tanked. Or win like 15 games straight and try to make the playoffs. I don’t know anymore.

First Period

  • I’m setting the over/under on how long it takes for a freak bounce or a missed pass causes a brutal goal against the Habs at five minutes.
  • Less than two minutes in there’s nearly one.
  • Okay we made it five minutes without a brutal mistake. I feel like the Habs should have one of those signs where they can track how long it’s been since their last brutal mistake that they hang behind the bench.
  • They can hire Gerard Gallant specifically to be the curator of this sign.
  • Who the hell is Alex Lyon?
  • I checked, he is in fact a Flyers goalie and he went to Yale. Fuckin’ nerd.
  • Big save on Max Domi, Big save on Artturi Lehkonen... 11 shots on goal and this nerd isn’t permitting any goals. Maybe he’s
  • Aaaaaand there it is. 1-0 Flyers.
  • Live shot of Tomas Tatar immediately after the Flyers goal incoming.
  • 1-1 thanks to Tuna’s slick hands.

Second Period

  • The Flyers got a breakaway while killing a penalty. Very Habs thing to allow.
  • Ilya Kovalchuk scores, though!?!?!?!?!?!?!? 2-1 and the old man’s trade value increases yet again.
  • I’m waiting for the equalizer from the flyers that will probably come soo.....
  • This isn’t how tanking is supposed to go, however, it is enjoyable to see the Habs having fun.
  • Connor Bunnaman, who we can also file under people I didn’t know existed, is off to the box. Send the Kovalchuk back in!
  • Nothing is really happening, but I feel the need to mention that Nick Suzuki is really good at hockey and is going to have a long career as a Canadien.
  • Thurrrrrd period time.

Third Period

  • You know who else is really good at hockey? Kovalchuk. If I didn’t know any better, I’d think this was 2007 Kovalchuk. Whatever they’re putting in his water bottle, I hope he keeps sipping.
  • Hooooooly shit...
  • Jesperi Kotkaniemi just beat the absolute shit out of Robert Hagg. This is not a joke.
  • I’m serious.
  • Of course, Kotkaniemi has to sit for an instigator penalty even though Hagg seemed perfectly willing to go in that situation...
  • Classic, quality NHL officiating.
  • I can’t get over this. Kotkaniemi is an enforcer now?? Just look at this!!
  • Young enough that he could have played in the world juniors this year. Old enough that he could beat the fuck out of your dad.
  • Kovalchuk might be the best free agent signing of Marc Bergevin’s career. He doesn’t sign a lot of free agents.
  • Well that’s one against the tank effort, but god damn was it fun...

EOTP 3 Stars of the night

3) This is usually true, but of course Kovalchuk had to go and ruin the tank effort.

2) This would be amazing.