"And so, we are down to one" say the Canadian journalists. We're down to one. Us. Canadians.
They aren't wrong. There is but one hope for Canada this Spring, and once again the hope sits on the shoulders of the brick wall known as Carey Price.
Do you remember the performance Price put on during the Olympics? Do you remember the feeling of pure ecstasy and joy as Price backstopped Canada to a gold medal on Russian soil?
Well, this time around the battleground will take place in North America, meaning you won't have to deal with any ungodly start times like we faced in Russia.
It should be a seamless transition for most fans. The only difference between Team Canada and the Habs is their offense, defense and coaching. If we're being honest that's bordering on nit-picking.
Of course, it's your duty, NAY, your patriotic responsibility to cheer for the Habs. If you plan on cheering for another team, tell me this: Why do you hate our great country? Why do you support the evil Yankee teams down south instead of your own kin?
Why do you hate polar bears? Did you know that according to Coca-Cola polar bears are ... well, they never quote numbers, but I assume polar bears are on the brink of extinction. Give your support to any other team than the Canadiens and you are essentially saying, "I'm ok with polar bears going extinct." Can you live with yourself knowing you caused the disappearance of such an iconic animal?
Why do you hate the Canadian economy? Don't you know that by buying a Canadiens jersey, as is your Canadian duty, supports medium sized Canadian businesses like the one that owns the Habs.
Why do you hate happiness? Let the anger go. Forget Phaneuf, forget Spezza, forget Ladd, forget Giordano, forget Sedin and forget whoever the captain of the Oilers happens to be. It's time to support players that embody the spirit of humble Canadian hockey, like P.K. Subban.
Never mind that no one has the right to tell you who to cheer for, or who not to cheer for. Ignore that you cheered against the Canadiens for the past 82 games, and spent the last 10 years of your life despising them.
Join us as we watch Subban get benched for every single mistake he makes, and as Douglas Murray challenges the physics behind inertia.
The torch is ours to hold highly for all of Canada. We'll do it with pride, we'll do it with conviction, and we might even hold it close enough to burn a few police cars.
There's nothing that Habs fans would love more than to have all the fans that trashed the team flip-flop into brand new supporters throughout this post-season. Did you crap on Subban all year? We've got a spot for you, Sens fans. Still angry at Pacioretty's sword sheathing celebration? Hop on Leafs fans, there's space at the back of the playoffS bus.
Or perhaps you are an Oilers fan, and you are just curious as to what playoff hockey entails. In that case don't hesitate to ask.
Don't mistake this for a sanctimonious attempt to dictate which team you will support, because when it comes down to it Canada, there's only one choice.
At the very least you should support the Canadiens as a thank you to Quebec for bringing home every single Canadian medal in the Olympics. A small price to pay for all that gold, wouldn't you agree?
Join us Canada, the drive for 25 begins on Wednesday. The pseudo-nationalism, however, will last forever.