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Donate money to charity and annoy Leafs fans

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Pension Plan Puppets has given us a glorious opportunity, my friends. Let's take advantage of it.

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Earlier this morning Pension Plan Puppets made a declaration. They want to raise $2000 for charity or they will close off their comments section for all 4 games of their inevitable first round sweep.

In order to encourage people to donate, they offered the following incentives:Donate $20: PPP, our mystery guest and I will thank you publicly on twitter.

Donate $50: All three of us will tweet a link to your website whenever you want.

Donate $100: One of us, your choice, will write a guest post on a topic of your choosing at your blog.

Donate $150: PPP and I will send you an autographed high res print of us at Wendel Clark's jersey retirement night.

Donate $500: I will send you a Leafs jersey out of my personal collection (my choice). (This will not be worth $500 and is probably a bad idea - my jersey collection is brutal).

Obviously, only one of these really appeals to us, and that's making them write about what we want them to write about.

Here is my idea; Let's pool our resources. [DETAILS ON DONATIONS HERE]

Not only is it for a great cause, but I can already think of several things it would pain these guys to write and have their names attributed to forever. Together, we could have them write a bunch of them.

Here are some ideas I have, and I've only thought about this for five minutes:

  1. Have them write about how the Canadiens would have swept the Maple Leafs in 1993 anyway, so complaining about it is pathetic.
  2. Have them write about how Kerry Fraser didn't really miss Gretzky's high stick, but Doug Gilmour dove and cut himself to draw a call because he's gutless.
  3. Have them write about how Wendel Clark is actually the league's most notorious wuss, and every fight he won, his opponent was paid off to take the fall.
  4. Have them write a convincing argument for Tyler Bozak to get an 8 year extension at 5M+ per year, and for his number to be honoured when he retires.
  5. Have them write about how Damien Cox is the best sportswriter in the history of sports and writing.
And this is just what I have to start! C'mon EOTP, let's do this. For charity. For hilarity.