Canadiens vs Wild - Max Pacioretty Has Something To Show You, Haters

Richard Wolowicz

Max Pacioretty scored a natural hat trick in a 6-2 rout of the Minnesota Wild by the Montreal Canadiens. Matt Cooke is still the worst human being on the planet.

  • There was some sort of fibre optic breakdown at the Bell Centre tonight, so there was no data being sent out, so there is no Extra Skater page for this game yet, so instead of linking to the data for this game, I'm going to summarise the three periods via anecdote.
  • Summary of the first period between the Canadiens and the Wild: the Habs directed approximately a million shots in the general direction of the net. None of them went in. Josh Harding is playing really well these days. Matt Cooke is an unmitigated douchebag.
  • Summary of the second period between the Canadiens and the Wild: the Habs directed approximately a million shots in the general direction of the net. All of them went in. Most of them were by Max Pacioretty. Yikes, what happened to Josh Harding? Matt Cooke is still an unmitigated douchebag.
  • Summary of the third period between the Canadiens and the Wild: Score effects caused some sustained pressure from the Wild in the Habs zone for like half a second. A Wild goal happened. A Daniel Briere goal happened. With a goalie in net, and eveything! Alex Galchenyuk scored a goal. Dany Heatley scored a goal. Everyone was like, "Dany Heatley's still a thing?" Matt Cooke will always be an unmitigated douchebag.
  • So how about that perimeter player, Max Pacioretty, eh?
  • Before this game, some of the EOTP crew were talking about having a Max Pacioretty Day or Max Pacioretty Week or Max Pacioretty Festival on this site. How obliging of Max to host the opening night of his own festival on Bell Centre ice for us tonight.
  • And as Arik said, Happy Pacioretty Day, everyone!
  • Yiiiiiiiiiiiiikes with that stanchion moment. I know I wasn't the only one who almost lost it at that.
  • All the Pacioretty haters, to the left.
  • Everything you own, in a box, to the left.
  • PS I left a box of angry bees, there, to the left.
  • My alternate title for this TSM was "A ‘W' For Effort."
  • I'm not sorry.
  • David Desharnais with a good couple of games since the second time he was scratched. A's for effort, Davey.
  • I'm not sorry.
  • This evening's Fight For No Reason At All was brought to you by Brandon Prust kicking Zenon Konopka's ass.
  • Loved the fourth line tonight.
  • I totally forgot Dany Heatley was even still in the NHL until maybe four minutes into the third period.
  • Ryan Suter did not appear to have a great night.
  • There should never, ever, be any doubt as to who the better Koivu is. Saku forever, Mikko is just a wannabe.
  • For JD__: tonight's Rene Bourque compliment is that his absence won the game for the Habs.
  • I'm seriously bummed there was no Extra Skater page for this game because I was ready to be really fucking smug about the Habs this evening. [UPDATE: The Extra Skater page has now been populated, but I don't know how accurate the numbers are, mostly because I thought more of them would clearly be in favour of the Habs.]
  • Poor Carey Price.
  • So here's what the Habs did tonight. They played with intensity, they played like they cared, they tried hard, the coaching was less bizarre than usual, and they won 6-2. Just like we've been yelling about for the past 10 games. 
  • Andrei Markov and P.K. Subban played an excellent game tonight but it took until almost the three stars for me to even mention them. Because this is a thing we now take for granted. "Oh, Markov and Subban were amazing? Meh."
  • Third Star: JonPublic with "Those Desharnais points are getting cheaper by the minute."
  • Second Star:JonPublic again, with this gif.
  • First Star: Dave_Murray with "I deem this game to be "acceptable"."

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