Thinking up his next example of 140-character brilliance. - Jonathan Daniel
NHLers (and former NHLers) have taken to blaming mysterious "hackers" for the controversial opinions, offensive jokes, and private messaging misfires they've been posting on Twitter. It turns out, NHL-player-Twitter-hacking has become quite the internet pandemic.
You'll find this shocking, average NHL fan/Twitter user, but we at EOTP have found out that there is a myriad of internet hackers out there that dedicate all their free time to hacking into the Twitter accounts of NHL players exclusively. These hackers then use the access they gain to make everyone turn on the hockey players. I mean, how else would you explain the below incidents? It's gotta be hackers.
- Phil Kessel once posted an interesting, engaging tweet, then realized who he was, immediately deleted it, and blamed hackers for it.
- A few weeks ago, Mike Fisher's timeline briefly read: "Seen who I wake up next to every day? Come at me with more purse jokes, bro."
- Adam Pardy recently publicly tweeted and then quickly deleted: "No, seriously, man, I'M ON YOUR TEAM. YES IN THE NHL. Okay, fine, I have no idea who I am, either."
- Tyler Seguin tweeted the word "bro" 2875487 times and didn't delete any of the tweets since apparently that's all his vocabulary consists of.
- Ryane Clowe once tweeted something innocuous but then blamed hackers for it because the tweet had appeared while he was sitting on the bench.
- "I really hope he got fat while we've been locked out," Ryan Kesler accidentally tweeted the other day, but there's no word yet on who he was referring to.
- Alexander Ovechkin and P.K. Subban appear to be best friends, judging from their leaked Direct Messages, each of which contains at least 100 exclamation points.
- Rene Bourque said "I am an atrocious hockey player." Okay, fine, that one was hacked. Okay, fine, by me.
- Andrew Ference once unleashed a torrent of obscenities on a Canadiens fan, but instead of owning up to it or blaming a hacker, he called it an "app malfunction."
- Ilya Bryzgalov accidentally posted a bunch of normal things on Twitter one time and was mortified when he realized they were public tweets instead of direct messages. He blamed them on some bears who got hold of his phone. While he was in space.
- I'd love to tell you what Shane O'Brien's recent accidental tweet was about, but it was so badly spelt and grammatically incorrect that I honestly have no idea.
- Michael Cammalleri put up a tweet that wasn't shilling for BioSteel and blamed it on some friends who stole his phone password.
- Paul Bissonnette and Daniel Carcillo both publicly posted a bunch of things you'd think were meant to be private, but no, they're public, and, apparently, for real. If you want to see those things, go to somewhere called The Entirety Of Their Twitter Timelines.